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August 1, 2013 / mintcustard

Fringe benefits.

I have entered #48HrFringe with Premier Inn

This blog post is my entry into the Foodies100 competition as part of Premier Inn’s Festival Fringe campaign. If I win my ideal 48 hour Edinburgh Festival Fringe weekend, I’d love to stay at Princes Street.

In my minds eye I am witty, erudite and charismatic. I am also a size 12 and have the skin of a 21 year old. Some of these dreams may one day become reality, some definitely will not (unless time travel gets invented in the next few years that is).

I can live with this.

I have come to terms with being me. What I do have a tiny problem with is that whilst I’m in my late 40s on the outside I’m still in my early 20’s on the inside. To release my inner youthfulness these days doesn’t take much. A glass of  wine, a small cocktail, probably even two wine gums would do it. Another way I find is to have time doing what I like. Teens if you are reading this, hoovering, picking up washing and being a cab service isn’t top of my list even though I spend a great deal of my time doing these tasks.

I love the eclectic, the bizarre, the downright odd.  I can also enjoy the very ordinary. Where then could I go to get all this? Edinburgh Fringe.

If I had a fantasy 48 hours in Edinburgh how would I spend my time? Sadly my body is that of a late 40’s woman and we need some sleep. Gone are the days of staying up for days on end fuelled only by laughter, friendship, beer and kebabs. I need a clean and tidy bedroom, impeccable sanitation and staff who won’t ration their smiles. I’d stay at Premier Inn on Princes Street.

As I said I like variety, not the juggling balls and men in in kipper ties telling questionable jokes type of variety although as I said slip me a cocktail and I’ll give it a go. No, variety in what I experience. So I’d make an effort to see something from each category. I might just skip the children’s shows, although when the girls were small I did once see Jamie Cullum supporting the Tellytubbies in Regent Street, so maybe…..

I’d want to see some cabaret, so I’m off to Oliver Meech, when Science and Magic collide, my geekiness just cant resisit this. Then I’d like to know the answer to “What would Beyonce do?” so I’d pop along to see that comedy production. India Flamenco intrigues me, will it work, combining Indian dance forms with flamenco. There is only one way to find out. I’ll have to see, perhaps there will be tapas too? I can’t not do a genteel Tipple through Gin in literature can I? A chance to emulate Dorothy Parker, is something I have to do!


After sobering up with tea at Jenners I think a look at the Man Ray retrospective. I love to wonder what the sitters were thinking as their portraits were being take. I’m always up for a meal so I think I’d go to have dinner with the King of the Swingers. I adore swing music and a chance to have Italian food from Valvona and Crolla is on my to do list anyway. Little Shop of Horrors is a musical that is so absurd I love it. I’d have to go and see it again. Virgina Ironside talking about Growing Old disgracefully seems right up my street, I’m not old yet but I plan to be a real pain in the a*s* when I get there! As a huge Bay City Rollers fan, I had the tartan trews and plimsoles, I have to see “and they played Shang a Lang”. A real blast from the past.

I’d plan to walk between venues if possible. Walking a city is the only way to get to know it.

I’d stop in coffee shops and cafes. I’d people watch and I’d eavesdrop. I’d be myself. For 48 hours, not a wife, not a mum, not a teacher, not a writer but me.

As well as the festival, I’d drink a whiskey, order a deep fried Mars bar and bring home a big bag of Edinburgh rock.


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